Talking Not Telling

Joanne Lockwood is joined by confidence coach and inclusion consultant Katie Allen to explore what it really means to “talk, not tell” in inclusion work. Together they unpack why people get stuck in ambiguity and fear saying the wrong thing, and how psychological safety can disappear the moment a conversation moves from business topics to subjects like racism, identity, or gender.

They dig into intention versus impact, accountability, and the everyday language choices that can cause harm—even when someone “meant well.” The conversation also looks at echo chambers, polarisation on social media, and how cultural intelligence grows when we actively seek out perspectives beyond our own.

A significant part of the episode centres on lived experience. Katie shares her identity as asexual and panromantic, explaining different forms of attraction and how asexuality is often misunderstood—including within LGBTQIA+ spaces. Joanne reflects on how transitioning changed her understanding of gendered experience and highlights how blind spots can remain around race and policing.

Throughout, the focus stays on curiosity over perfectionism: creating space for respectful conversation, learning, and changing behaviour when we discover our words or assumptions have negative impacts.